9/11

This morning in my American Government class we watched a movie about 9/11. It was an interview with a columnist from the New York Times. Umm...his name was Thomas something. Anyways, he spent a long time travelling to different Islam countries asking them about 9/11. It was a new perspective on 9/11 that most Americans don't see. Many of the people in the countries he visited were happy about what happened to us on 9/11. He talked to some students and asked them what they thought the purpose of 9/11 was. The overall response seemed to be that they didn't like how the Americans looked down on them and killed innocent people in their country like it was nothing; but when it came to killing innocent people in our country it was unfathomable. It was interesting when he spoke to one girl in particular. She said that it's funny how now anytime the word 'muslim' is mentioned in the U.S. now, it is associated with terrorists and killers, and Americans think every muslim is a terrorist. His repsonse to her comment was that it was a fact. He said it wasn't 19 Norweigians that attacked us; if it was, we would be wary of Norweigians. I thought that was interesting. The documentary didn't really have a plot or anything, it was just another view of 9/11 from the point of the other side. It was sad some of the things that the people thought about America...things that they had seen on the internet or read in their biased newspapers. Some people actually thought that Americans had bombed NYC on 9/11! It was just crazy to see this side of the issue. Most of us just think about our side.

my likes/don't likes

My likes: /My dislikes:
love /hypocracy
food/ drama
friendship/ rules/restrictions
loyalty/ parents
clothes /drugs
talking/ confrontation
uniqueness/ decisions
simplicity /school(work)
pink /judgement
money/ racism
work/ closedmindedness
freedom/ 'your' instead of 'you're'
coffee/ frat boys
traditions/ shyness
cleaning/ change
my birthday/ periods
music being under 21
the south/ stupidity
morals/ fakeness
fate/ hopelessness
memphis/ bad tippers
sleep/ high school
tv/ reading
procrastination

4A is like 9B:
Loyalty is like judgement because the really go hand in hand. Loyalty is an important quality to have. It is sticking by someone no matter what. It's being there for a person because they are important to you, even if you might not necessarily believe all their ideals. Judgement is a discusting habit that everyone is guilty of. It's looking at someone and thinking things about them that you have no right to. It's placing an opinion on someone else's life or situation, that you may know nothing about. Judgement can also be good. It is important to know when to use good judgement. When you compare the two, they are both qualities of one's personality. To be loyal, you have to have good judgement. good judgement can stop you from making mistakes or putting yourself in situations where you could be unloyal.

Interpretations of column A:
If you sum up all the items in column A, they are overall happy things. A lot of them are somewhat materialistic, but for the most part, they simply describe a laid-back, happy attitude. If using the list to describe the person, you can see that the list is that of someone who is outgoing, confident, and independant.

5B causes 3B:
Drugs cause rules/restrictions. This one is pretty much a no brainer. Obviously when it comes to illegal drugs, there has to be rules and restrictions. If we let everyone walk around, go to work and school, etc. while being on cocaine or meth, we would have some problems on our hands. Drugs can be a serious problem that affect everyone. Not only do they put the user in danger for their health, it risks the lives of those around them. You can not predict the actions of someone on drugs. Therefore, it is crucial that there are rules and restrictions against drugs.

"a-ha!"

So an a-ha moment? Well it surely isn't that I've realized how I am like my mom...that day will NEVER come! Not because I will never REALIZE I'm like my mom...but because I will never be like her!! Ever!! Unfortunately I never had that a-ha moment of what I wanted to be when I grow up. I still don't know. I'm waiting for that a-ha moment....if it could just go ahead and happen, that would be great. I don't know how many a-ha moments I've ever had in my life. But I guess one thing that has been on my mind a lot...that I've gotten some perspective on....and you could say I've had maybe a few a-ha moments about...is my relationship with my boyfriend.

Jenn pretty much outed the fact that we broke up to the whole class...thanks for that one Jenn! But no, it's a very good thing that we decided to take this break. You know, after being with someone for over a year, you start to realize some things. Or at least I did. I just realized that I wasn't me anymore, and I wasn't being fair to myself by letting him get away with a lot of things that he did. I love my boyfriend more than anything and my a-ha moment was kind of when I realized that despite this set-back, we will be ok. We will get through this and it will make us stronger. I hate telling people that we're on a break because everybody's response is "yeah that means y'all broke up. a break means that he's hooking up with other girls, but still wants to know that you're there just in case." Well that's not how it is. And I hate it when people try to tell me it is...because I think I know my own situation a little better than you do. Ya know? Like who are you to judge my relationship? But anyways...things just were not good anymore. I wasn't happy at all. And it's because I never spoke up for myself. I never told him when things bothered me, and we kept so much stuff locked up. And that's not like us at all. For the past year, he's been my best friend...we told each other everything. I don't know if it was the distance between us-him going to school 4 1/2 hours away-or just that we had never really experienced anything else...just each other. I think there was a lot of curiosity there...the mere fact that there were so many people we didn't know. So needless to say, things were not good. And we both knew it, we just didn't want to admit it. Even though things weren't good, I still loved him and nothing would change that.

So for fall break I headed up to Sewanee, TN. I promised myself that before I left to come back home, I would sit down and have a talk with him, because I could not go on being that unhappy. It didn't look like it was going to happen because it was the last night I was there and we still hadn't talked. But after a few parties and a lot of drinks later (me, not him) we ended up in his room, talking. Eventually, through tears, questions, confessions, and tons of emotions, we decided the best thing to do would be to go on a break...mostly for him, so he could take some time to mature, and to find himself, and his feelings. It was so bittersweet. Bitter because this is the boy I love and I knew how much it would hurt to be apart. Sweet because I knew deep down that things could not get better until we took this step. I set the rules. I didn't want to talk until the holidays and at that point he would be home and we would go on a date and figure things out then. I thought it would be too hard to talk to him knowing we weren't exactly together.

So I came home. I wasn't expecting to talk to him for at least a month. But the next day I had a voicemail from him. Then I got on facebook and had a message from him. And I won't go into too much detail (I'm not sure how thrilled he would be that I'm sharing all this with the world), but the basis of what I was hearing from him was that once he realized he lost me, he knew how much he loved me. And at that point I knew everything would be ok. Things would be good again and we would get back together. It's still hard to not talk to him every day like we used to, but we talk at least once a week...just to make sure we know what's going on in each other's lives. I can't wait until he comes home in two weeks for Thanksgiving. I miss him a lot. But I just keep telling myself, this was good. We needed this, and things will be ok because of this. Somewhere I heard this phrase: "If you love someone set them free, if they comes back it was meant to be." And I truely believe that...you know, everything happens for a reason.

The House of Judgement

I was flipping through the tv channels the other day when I caught a glimpse of something that made me want to stop and watch. Surprisingly, it was Dr. Phil. I've never been one to watch Dr. Phil. If there was any one of those talk shows that I was going to watch it would be Oprah....or Ellen...but certainly not Dr. Phil. But what I saw infuriated me so much, that I couldn't bring myself to change the channel. I'm not sure what the exact topic for the show was, but it had something to do with judgemental people.

The episode focused on 6 people in the audience who had been brought on to share their completely judgemental views on life. The first one I saw, the one that made me stop and watch, was a chauvinistic man. He went on and on about how woman are worthless and the only thing they are good for is having babies...but then they don't even raise them right...and spending men's money. He went on to say that women can not hold positions of power or leadership, and commented that if there was ever a woman president we would pretty much be screwed becaue women can't make decisions. He said that women shouldn't even be given the right to vote! I was so mad! How are there people in this world that even think like this? And it's those kind of people that no matter what you say to them, they will never change their view.

Next was a woman who was "morally righteous." She walked around the streets holding a bible and preaching to people about all the ways they would go to hell. She would just walk up to people and tell them they needed to change their lives or they would go to hell...she didn't know them, for all she knew, she could be talking to a priest. But she wasn't preaching the word of the bible...that's just what she claimed to be doing...she was preaching her way of life. She walked up to a girl on the street who had piercings on her face and told her that God didn't like that and if she didn't repent she was going to hell. Well damn! Looks like I'm going to hell then too! She said that you would go to hell if you had sex before marriage and to that Dr.Phil asked if she was married and she said no, then he asked if she had ever had sex and her reply was "Well..." These people are complete hypocrites! They refuse to listen to what anyone else has to say...they are right no matter what, even if what they are saying contradicts itself.

Then they had a man who hated society. He said that 90% of people were morons and that they were just sheep following the crowd. I would say he was the least of the bad. He didn't try to push his views on anyone else, he kept it to himself. But still...the fact that anyone could believe that is dumb. Then there was a woman who "hates ugly people." She said if you're ugly, you might as well not talk to her. She walks down the streets and just make comments about anyone that passes her. There was an overweight woman pushes her child in a stroller down the street, and when the woman saw that, she said she should turn around and beat that woman's ass. The best part about it thought is that the woman who said all this was not attractive in the least! She had crooked, yellow teeth, her hair was greasy, and she looked like white trash.

The one that made me the most mad (and you'll probably understand why) was a woman who was extrememly racist. The woman was racist against black people, but SHE was black!! She said that black people are just whores, prostitutes, gang bangers, they have no education, and on and on...She went on to say that she would never let her children play with black kids. She married a white man. But whenever Dr. Phil asked her questions, she would get tripped up, because she was so hypocritical, that she didn't have anything to say back without making herself look stupid. I mean if you think all these things about black people, is it ok for people to think that about you? And she was like...no, she's not a prostitute or a whore. But you're black....so you must be a prostitute right? I mean seriously. I was getting so pissed off

The last of the 6 I missed because she cam on before I flipped to that channel, but apparently she was the opposite of the chauvinistic man-she hated men. At the end of the show Dr. Phil brought all 6 up to the stage and announced what his "therapy" was going to be. With people whose views are this extreme though, they normally don't care what anyone says, because they think they're right no matter what. But Dr. Phil announced that he was going to put all of them in the "Dr. Phil house." They would all have to live with each other, with their views and opinions. He them went on to assign roommates. The chauvinist man and the woman who hates men will room together. The man who hates society and people who are materialistic will room with the woman who hates ugly people. And the racist and morally righteous woman will be roomies. So this should be interesting. It starts Monday...and they're going to cover what happens in the "house of judgement" as they call it. I hope I get a chance to watch it. It just makes me so mad to know that there are actually people in this world that think like that. And they aren't the only 6. There must be some serious psycological things going on with these people. They are so unsecure with themselves, that they have to make it out to be other peoples' problems. I'm looking forward to seeing what happens with these people. To see if there's any hope at all.

Stupid Fire Alarm!

Ok so I'm kind of still mad right now from this morning when the fire alarm in Richardson Towers went off at 10 am. I was still in bed and wasn't planning on getting up for at least another hour when all of a sudden I hear the most annoying noise in the world and see a bright light flashing in my room. I woke up and realized it was the fire alarm. I didn't even have any pants on. Just underwear and a tank top. Well I was in no hurry. I got some shorts out of my drawer, put a sweatshirt on because I figured it would be chilly, put my shoes on, then I grabbed my purse and put my phone in it and got my keys out and left with my roommate. I made sure to lock my door because I was told that people sometimes pull the fire alarm and then go room to room and see who left their door unlocked and then steal stuff. So I always make sure to lock the door. So we go outside and we're standing out there for more than 30 minutes. I was really getting pissed off. I didn't get enough sleep, I had to pee, and I was hungry. It's just so dumb. There's not a fire, someone just pulled the alarm. I know they have to pretend like it's a real fire, but everyone knows there was no fire. Even the firemen probably get tired of coming to towers for our fire alarms. I bet every time they get the call they are thinking "Oh great, another 'fire' at Richardson Towers." It's just so annoying. What thrill do people get from pulling a fire alarm? Sometimes I guess it goes off because people are dumb and they burn things in their microwaves. But seriously people, this is ridiculous! Goh, I'm just so furious about it. I was getting so mad just standing outside for 30 minutes when I could be sleeping. And of course I couldn't go back to sleep when I got back up here. I was already awake by then. I'm just so mad. That's that.

Hairspray

Last night my mom and I went to see Hairspray at the Orpheum. I don't really prefer to hang out with my mom, but every now and then we go out and it's kind of nice. We just don't normally get along very well, so I try to avoid seeing her, but last night was fun. First we went to eat dinner at Big Foot Lodge. I don't know if you've ver been there, but they are famous for their 5 pound burger. Only one person has ever eaten it and they were a professional eater. The rules are that you have to finish the entire burger with all the dressings in 60 minutes. Well while we were there, someone ordered it. I walked over to see exactly how big it was and that thing was ridiculous! It looked like a cake! The bun was bigger than my head. How anyone could ever eat that is beyond me. I used to work at Cheeburger Cheeburger and we were famous for our one pound burger. Well I ate that one time and I just barely finished it....I can't imagine trying to eat a 5 pound burger!!! crazy!! I don't know if he finished it, we left before then.

After we ate dinner we headed down to the orpheum to see Hairspray. I love going to the Orpheum. It's so fancy and fun. It's like you're in New York going to Broadway. In fact, the Orpheum is a lot nicer than a lot of theatres on Broadway...so it's really fun. I saw the movie Hairspray when it came out in the summer, so I was super excited to come see the show. If you've never seen the show you're truly missing out. It's set in 1962 in Baltimore. The main character is Tracy Turnblad, an overweight teen whose dream is to be on the Corny Collins Show, which is about the equivalent to what our American Bandstand was. After she gets on the show, she makes it her mission to make "Negro day" everyday. This of course was in a time when many things were segregated. It's a great show because it covers the issues of segregation and racism but in a lighter, more fun tone. It's not heavy or sad...just lighthearted fun. Through the course of the show Tracy falls in love with the main male dancer Link Larken. Tracy's best friend Penny also falls in love, but with Seaweed, a black guy. Of course Penny is my favorite character for that. It's so funny because Penny is very sheltered...her mother doesn't let her do anything and certainly wouldn't approve of her dating a black boy. It's also refreshing becausse it was during a time when that definitely wouldn't be accepted, but they don't care, they are in love. There's one song in the show called without love and Penny sings a line saying "In my ivory tower life was just a hostess snack, But now I've tasted chocolate and I'm never going back."

It's a great show. The actors were great. The part of Tracy was actually played by the understudy last night and she was great. I can't wait for Rent to come in a couple weeks. That will be my next Orpheum outing. My mom won't be here though....anybody want to go?

Choir Tour

Man I'm exhausted! I just got back from our choir tour to Jackson. We left yesterday morning at 6:30, had three concerts yesterday, then woke up today at 7 and had two more concerts, then we drove back. I don't think I've ever been so tired of singing! My calves are killing me! I've been wearing heels while standing for pretty much the entire past 36 hours. My right arm feels like when you go to the gym for the first time in like a year....it's really sore from holding up our music folders while singing. I know that sounds super pathetic right? We can't even hold a folder. But seriously a thick, choir folder, with about 10 pieces of long choral music, and holding it up in the air for a good 12 hours or so...yeah it hurts. Gosh, the pain us singers go through! Yeah I know...I'm a baby. But it was so much fun. As tired as we were, I really enjoyed going to the different high schools and seeing the reactions we got from the kids that we sang for. We sing this one gospel song and that's everyone's favorite. As soon as we bust out that song, everyone is clapping. I love it. It's my favorite too....I wish I had one of those huge gospelly voices. Anyways....I just had singing on the brain, since I just got back from singing and all. IF anybody's bored next Sunday, the 11th, we have our fall concert at Cathedral of Immaculate Conception at 4:00. So come on out if you don't have anything else to do, or if you just really love choral music! Theres a good gospel song in it for you....it's worth it!